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Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
Thank you for sending me a copy of your book - I\'ll waste no time reading it.
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If it wasn\'t for lawyers, we wouldn\'t need them.
Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.
All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl.
Mother-in-law = A woman who destroys her son-in-law\'s peace of mind by giving him a piece of hers.
All things are possible, except skiing through a revolving door.
Misunderstandings and neglect create more confusion in this world than trickery and malice. At any rate, the last two are certainly much less frequent.
Why was I with her? She reminds me of you. In fact, she reminds me more of you than you do!
First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.
Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.
Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake.
A scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar.
The role of the president of the United States is to support the decisions that are made by the people of Israel. It is not up to us to pick and choose from among the political parties.
Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.
I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it\'s fantastic.
If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside.
An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered.
Too many pieces of music finish too long after the end.
There are many kinds of people in the world. Are you one of them?
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Outside of a dog, a book is man\'s best friend. Inside of a dog, it\'s too dark to read.
Before the war is ended, the war party assumes the divine right to denounce and silence all opposition to war as unpatriotic and cowardly.
There is only one nature - the division into science and engineering is a human imposition, not a natural one. Indeed, the division is a human failure; it reflects our limited capacity to comprehend the whole.
Fill what\'s empty, empty what\'s full, and scratch where it itches.
Don\'t knock masturbation, it\'s sex with someone I love .
Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She\'s 97 today and we don\'t know where she is!
The internet is not something you just dump something on. It\'s not a truck. It\'s a series of tubes!
The truth is more important than the facts.
The bureaucracy is expanding to meet the needs of an expanding bureaucracy.
The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a \'C\', the idea must be feasible.
Elegance is not a dispensable luxury but a factor that decides between success and failure.
Is it not a strange blindness on our part to teach publicly the techniques of warfare and to reward with medals those who prove to be the most adroit killers?
It\'s clearly a budget. It\'s got a lot of numbers in it.
The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them.
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Early to rise and early to bed. Makes a male healthy, wealthy and dead.
Minsky\'s Second Law: Don\'t just do something. Stand there.
Ah well, then I suppose I shall have to die beyond my means.
The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them.
Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritations and resentments slip away and a sunny spirit takes their place.
There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately it kills all its students!
My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you\'ll be happy; if not, you\'ll become a philosopher.
The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. The opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth.
I\'m trying to see things from your point of view but I can\'t get my head that far up my ass.
My opinions might have changed, but not the fact that I am right.
I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.
Where are we going, and why am I in this handbasket?
Object-oriented programming is a style of programming designed to teach students about stacks.
The bureaucracy is expanding to meet the needs of an expanding bureaucracy.
The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.
Sometimes, the best answer is a more interesting question
Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
I don\'t believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
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If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can\'t it get us out?
If the brain were so simple we could understand it, we would be so simple we couldn\'t.
... one of the main causes of the fall of the Roman Empire was that, lacking zero, they had no way to indicate successful termination of their C programs.
People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid.
I criticize by creation - not by finding fault.
最終更新日 : 2012/05/14/(Mon) 15:33
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